The trip for Anne Arundel County was actually a good thing, as it allowed for a “dry run” of the state certification. The capitol of Maryland is Annapolis, which is not only America’s sailing capitol (of great interest, I’m sure, to dear natives of North Dakota), it also temporarily served as our nation’s capitol back in 1783. Anyway, there is a lot of government ongoing in Annapolis so both the county and state offices are there; as a result, after getting papers county certified at 7 Church Circle, I walked over to 16 Francis Street, the home of the Office of the Secretary of State, and checked things out.
I wish I could recall the ladies names in the Jeffrey Building since they were so very welcoming and nice. When, how, and how long were questions the inquiring visitor wanted to know. 8:00am-4:30pm, Monday through Friday; just show up with your documents; and the process takes no longer than 15 minutes. Great, since the moment the FDL hit our mailbox, we wanted to get right back here and do just that.
But all was not yet great. We had been trying to track general progress on FDL requests and the CIS website indicated they were still processing requests from back in October. What, October?! Website, schebsite, can we talk to someone live? It turns out that was possible and on February 7th we got in touch with the office. We wanted to know where we were in the pile, and if we could move to the top of the pile.
After my 30-second introductory spiel to Ms. Carol, she responded saying, “Yes, I have your file.” Yes, she knew who we were! Well, as it turns out, we were going to have one of those “don’t ask a question unless you want an answer” moments. Ms. Carol said there was information missing in our application and CIS would be sending back an “Intent to Deny” notice. That status would change to “Denied” if the issue wasn’t addressed within 30 days. Information missing? Could be denied? I felt like a man with a pace maker having just hit the bottom of the first big drop on a roller coaster.
It is the only time in the entire process that we were disappointed with our agency, and we were extremely so. This was awkward and tough since everyone is so darn nice; but the niceness didn’t help in the application when it was attention to details that were needed. In verbal and contractual language with AGCI it was and is stressed (over and over) that Rose and I are responsible for the outcome of the adoption, and AGCI is exempt. That legalese is understood; yet there is no question that in addition to the emotional support provided by AGCI we rely on them to ensure we are following the process and, most importantly, dotting the proverbial i’s and crossing the t’s.
Regardless, it was necessary to move on. We are all human; plus we knew everyone had the best of intentions and actions for Rose, me, and the child we did not yet know. Our adoption partners were very apologetic, and more importantly, very confident in the approach to rectify the situation.
The troops rallied and two weeks later on February 21st we received the updated home study to send off to CIS. A quick if not lucky scan of it showed, however, the documents were dated for 2006. Goodness. It was not a clich̩: the Devil Рwho does despise adoption Рwas in our details, to the point of partying in our problems. And, maybe, that Wednesday being Ash Wednesday, it was a symbolic and humble reminder that Lent had started.
Another two days would be needed to fix the date issue, and the updated plea was delivered to CIS on February 26th. We waited, again.
But, we would not be in the desert for 40 days – just three days later we were resurrected! March had come in like a lion, delivering our FDL! Praises to the Lord, and to Ms. Carol of CIS for taking care of us. The United States of America had determined we were “able to furnish proper care to an orphan as defined in Section 101 (B)(1)(F) of the Immigration and Nationality Act.” Whatever that section says, super, we were approved, and a plan was put in place to have our dossier done (by done, I mean done) and delivered to AGCI by Wednesday March 7th. We prayed it was God’s plan, too.
Katie came through once again with last-minute notarizations, and the clerks did too with the county certifications. We decided I should go to Annapolis for the State Certification, as it would have been too much for Rose and the kids; so I took off work on that big day for us, Tuesday the 6th.
It didn’t start off smoothly because I took the wrong exit and, um, got lost. To boot, I also did the guy thing and did not ask for directions (it’s important to be consistent). So that cost a good hour plus; but the parking was cheap when the Honda finally pulled into the garage a little before lunch.
The day was clear and crisp, and my short walk to Francis Street past all the redbrick bedecked buildings began the swelling of a celebration for our family. There was no guard at the door this time, and this guy wasn’t going to wait for one either. I signed in, though, and opened the same door I had opened a month prior on the dry run. It was quiet and not a soul was in front of me; there was no red carpet, but it was as though I was expected.
Greeted with a courteous manner once again, I explained the need of our family and handed a stack over the clerk that was 16 documents high. Then I moved a few feet over to the waiting area and tried to take the moment in. I must not have taken much in because the details of the open room escape me. Of remembrance, however, was a wall lined with items from about 10 foreign countries. Each nation represented was part of the Maryland Sister State Program, which oversees an array of international exchanges, promoting a balance of business, educational and cultural interests. The Anhui Province of China was there, and though I knew nothing of the area it comforted me during the wait – yes, people worked together.
I could hear the sweet sound of the printer kicking out paper (no jams please!), and then – then – I was called back over to the desk. Everything was complete, and with all that was riding on this moment, that promise was double-checked by me.
Indeed, a gold-sticker version of the Great Seal of Maryland was on each one, featuring a plowman, a fisherman, a shield and a coat of arms. In the seal one finds the Italian words, “Fatti maschi, parole femmine,” or Manly deeds, womanly words. It turns out some prefer the translation of strong deeds, gentle words. Okay, that’s fine, but that modest controversy pales to an activist atheist getting a hold of the present-day testimony on each certification by the Secretary of State:
“In Testimony Whereof, I hereunto set my hand and have caused to be affixed the official seal of the Secretary of State, at Annapolis, this sixth day 2007 of March, in the year of our Lord.”
The end emphasis is mine. It’s warming to see our state not yet having abandoned Anno Domini for the delusional Common Era designation.
There was nothing common in the moment of me stepping outside of the building, and I immediately called Rose to rejoice with her. It was really true: we had all the documents necessary for our dossier and, symbolic to that of a child, they were clutched tightly to my bosom.
Needless to say, the ride back was much smoother than the ride down. And on the way home I did what any other boy does in moments like these and called my mother. Parenthood is all about sharing, and she of course was elated. Rose and I would also one day want to share the triumph with our child; as a result, after painstakingly making four copies of the 68-page stack at a stop at Staples, then making it through the front door of our home, the dining rooming table was cleared, the documents were laid out side-by-side, and a mini-photo shoot ensued.
As the papers were gathered back up into a pile up, the one on top stood out the most in our eyes and our hearts. It was our Application Letter to the China Center for Adoption Affairs. It was to be written by the husband, and cover a few key points about abuse and abandonment; otherwise, the letter was our opportunity to present our family to the earthy entity that controlled our adoption.
To Whom It May Concern:
Hello, my name is Demian Seeley. I have the honor of introducing our family to you and respectfully applying for adoption to the People’s Republic of China.
I was born in Washington D.C. (USA) on October 11, 1969, and grew up in Maryland (USA) as an only child with my mother and father. My parents provided me with a wonderful childhood, teaching me to respect others, and to value education. I have a bachelor’s degree in engineering, and will complete my Master’s degree from Johns Hopkins University this spring. Throughout my 16-year professional career I have had both technical and managerial positions, and currently serve as a director of a business unit for a communications firm.
My wife Rosalie is an extraordinary woman who was born on December 16, 1970 in Maryland (USA). Growing up as one of twelve children, she learned the power and importance of a loving family. Her parents stressed education and hard work as the path to independence, as well as the key to helping others. Rosalie used her bachelor’s degree in Early Childhood Education during her years as a teacher; and since achieving her Master’s degree in 2000, she has worked as a Pediatric Occupational Therapist, helping children with special needs.
Rosalie and I have been married since 1997, and have been blessed with three wonderful children, Julia, Benjamin, and Elizabeth. Throughout our time together we have frequently discussed our strong desire to adopt a child – to share our love, and to bring more love into our home. Today, we write to you, both excited and humbled, asking to adopt a boy or girl from China up to the age of twelve months at the time of referral.
Please know this child will never be physically or emotionally abused or abandoned once adopted and brought into the United States. Rather, he or she will be a cherished part of our family, and treated equally with all of us. Our first priority will be to make him or her a U.S. citizen as soon as possible. In addition, we will participate in and fulfill all post-placement requirements for the country of China.
Throughout life, our child will be blanketed with love and taught the values necessary for him or her to grow into a beautiful person. An important part of our child’s upbringing will be to learn about the amazing history of China, and to take great pride in the culture of his or her homeland. We, as a family, have already joyfully begun our journey of learning.
Thank you so very much for your time. Our family greatly appreciates your attention to and care of our application.
Sincerely,
Demian P. Seeley
Rosalie M. Seeley
That letter and all the other papers that served to say who the Seeley family was were sent to AGCI. Inside was a note to Kate of AGCI:
Here is everything, we pray. It’s your turn now. Thank you in
advance for your care of our family, near and far.
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